The Attack of Sin

Sin attacks humanity at its very foundations, at the level of what motivates us and what ends we strive for; it shapes the very structures of society and of the philosophies which justify those structures; it strives continually to remake us in its own image; and unless we can see the difference between the kind of values instilled into us by the world and those which the Bible would have us develop, we are doomed to be forever caught in a web of worldliness that dishounors God.

Carl Trueman
Reformation: Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow
Page 57

Being Thankful

When you are out and about in your daily life and you look at the lostness of the people around you and sense their spiritual darkness and see their spiritual blindness, it should cause you to be thankful for your own salvation.  You had nothing more to offer God than those lost in the darkness of their own sin; and, in fact, you were just as lost in the darkness of your own sin until the Lord shined the light of the gospel into your heart and the One who is the Light came and took up residence in your heart.  Your inner man was just as dead and lifeless without God and without hope, and without the spark of eternal life until the Holy Spirit moved upon you and you were born again to a living hope.

It is He, the One who has created all things and holds all things together, whose throne stands alone in the heavens, who has declared the end from the beginning who has called you with a holy calling and adopted you as his sons and daughters to be His heirs alongside His only begotten Son, and has given you His kingdom as your inheritance, that loves you who was as unlovable, rebellious, and just as much His enemy as those around you who are now His enemies.  It is He, the One who stretched out the heavens, laid the foundation of the earth, calls each star by name, and has formed your spirit within you and fashioned your heart....Yes, it is this very One who has loved you with the same love with which He loves His Son, who has placed you into Christ, raised you up from death with Him, has seated you in the heavenly places with Him, and who will pour out the riches of His grace upon you for all eternity.  This is the One who has lavished upon you all the lovingkindnesses of salvation while you were so undeserving.

Thinking about the greatness and wonder of our salvation, and understanding that the only thing that separates us from the myriads around us every day who are lost in their sins, is the love of God for us, should elicit the most profound thanksgiving from the very depths of our being.  Thank You Lord!  Thank You Lord! Thank You Lord! It is not enough, but all that we can say.  Let us enter into His courts with abundant praise, and His gates with joyous thanksgiving this Lord's day as we ponder anew the greatness and wonder of His saving us.

We Need Grace

We need grace, grace in abundance, because we have been called to do the impossible...to be like God, and commanded to do the impossible...love Him with all our heart, soul, and strength; to love our neighbor as our self; and to love one another as Christ loved us.  We are to be holy as He is holy, to walk as He walked in Christ, to be imitators of God and Christ, to not return evil for evil or insult for insult, to walk the extra mile, to turn the other cheek, to treat others as we would have them treat us, to live as He would live, to love as He loves, to put others ahead of ourselves, to say no to each and every temptation, to live for Him and not ourselves, to put Him ahead of all others, to please Him and not ourselves, to do all that we do for His glory and proclaim His excellencies.

Fortunately, what God requires, He supplies; and He does that in and through grace...this is the essence of grace.  In Romans 5:2 we see that we stand in grace.  In Romans 5:17 we learn that we have been given an abundance of grace.  In Romans 5:20 we understand that where sin abounds grace abounds all the more.  In I Timothy 1:14 we see the Lord's grace is more than abundant with the faith and love found in Christ Jesus.  In II Corinthians 9:8 we see that God is able to make all grace abound to us; and in II Corinthians 12:9 we learn that His grace is always sufficient as His power is perfected in our weaknesses.  In II Corinthians 3:5-6 we discover that our adequacy is from God as He has made us adequate as servants of the new covenant.  In Philippians 4:13 we see we can do all things in Christ who strengthens us.  In II Peter 1:2 God reveals that grace is multiplied to us in the knowledge of Him and His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ.  In Ephesians 2:8 we have the truth that we are saved by grace.

Yes, friends, we need grace to make it.  We need grace to do and to be all that God has called us to do and to be.  Thanks be to God who has lavished the riches of His grace upon us so that we can be all that He has called us to be, so that His purpose will be accomplished in us.

Pastoral Counseling--Marital

In the last post about pastoral counseling I talked about identifying the core sin in the life of the person who has come in for counseling, and how important it was to identify it quickly. Again, I am certainly not holding myself out as an expert on marital counseling, but the same approach should be used in marital counseling as well. However, in most cases, when counseling about marital issues-which are really relationship issues-you will find two sins that tend to be the core sins in most instances. They are selfishness and unforgiveness, and they seem to be at the root of most of the marital/relationship issues that I have encountered.

Let's face it, we are all selfish pigs to one degree or another, or in one area or another. You have your area(s) and I have mine. We have all brought our areas of selfishness and selfish attitudes into our marriage relationships, and when selfishness exists and is not dealt with or given up, then conflicts are a natural result. Selfishness is a relationship inhibitor, and extreme selfishness is a relationship destroyer. James speaks to the origin and destructive power of selfishness in 3:13-4:3 of his epistle. What I have found during the years is that selfishness is at the root of most marital conflicts. Whenever you come across the-"I want my way!"-"I want what I want when I want it!" attitude during the counseling sessions, then understand you are staring selfishness in the face; but realize that it is also expressed in much subtler ways; and when you uncover the selfishness you may also discover that the ways that were used as a child to get what was wanted accompany the selfishness into the relationship. 

How do you deal with selfishness when you find it during the counseling sessions?

1. Identify it, and point it out. Many times the people you are counseling are so used to being selfish, they won't realize their own selfishness unless someone points it out.

2.  Call it what it is...sin, and get them to acknowledge that it is sin. Use the verses in James to show where it comes from and its destructive effects.

3.  Go to Philippians 2:3-7 to show them selfishness has no place in the life of the believer, and that we are commanded not to be selfish.

4.  Take them to I Corinthians 13:5...love does not seek its own...to show them that selfishness is an expression of a lack of love, and that love is the higher way.

5. Use II Corinthians 8:9, Romans 15:2-3, Philippians 2:3-5 to show them the attitude that Christ had, and as such it is to be our attitude.

Will following these steps automatically solve the conflict? No, because selfishness is so ingrained in us that it is hard to root out; but if the people you are counseling want to be more like Christ, want to grow in their faith, and truly want the conflict(s) resolved, this will start them down the right path.

Unforgiveness is the other sin that causes much damage in marital relationships. Who of us has not been wounded in one way or the other by words, actions, inactions, or attitudes of our spouse? Who of us has not wounded our spouse by our words, actions, inactions, or attitudes? What brings healing to these situations? Confession and forgiveness; and ultimately it is not the confession that brings the healing, but the forgiveness by the one offended, regardless of whether the offending party has confessed and apologized or not. Unforgiveness is the root of bitterness (Hebrews 12:15) and just as the verse points out, it defiles many as bitterness leads to wrath, anger, clamor, slander, and malice (Ephesians 4:30), which are always destructive forces in a relationship.

How do you deal with unforgiveness?  Actually, this one is usually easier to spot and point out as most people know when they are being unforgiving.

1. Just as in steps one and two above, unforgivness must be identified and called for what it is...a sin.

2. Take them to Matthew 6:12-15 and Matthew 18:21-35 to show them God's view toward their unforgiveness, His command to forgive, and their personal consequences (in addition to the marital conflict) of being unforgiving.

3. Take them to Hebrews 12:15 and Ephesians 4:30-31 to show how unforgiveness not only grieves the the Holy Spirit of God, but how it will poison and defile them and others.

4. Show them in Ephesians 4:30 and Colossians 3:12-13 that we are expected to be as forgiving towards others as Christ was/is toward us.

5. Use I Peter 4:8 and I Corinthians 13:5 to show the power of love over unforgiveness, and again that love is the higher way, and since we have the immeasurable love of God already in our heart (Romans 5:5), we have God's love and therefore God's capacity to forgive.

Are there other issues surrounding and connected with selfishness and unforgiveness? Sure there are, but until you uncover and point out these two issues, you cannot begin to deal with the other issues connected with them; and dealing with these first will make unraveling the other issues easier.

Additionally, we should always watch our attitude and demeanor when counseling. Remember, we are to speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15), not in self righteousness, not in a condemning way, not to put them down, but to correct them and reprove them for the benefit of their marriage and their relationship with the Lord; and if you can't say it in love, maybe it shouldn't be said until you can. Truth is confrontational and cuts to the quick, so speaking the truth in love both wounds and heals; and when the people you are counseling know that you love them and have their best at heart, they will be much more willing to receive what you have to say. Remember, your counseling them is ultimately to further their growing up in all aspects into Him.

Pastoral Counseling--Foundational

I am not going to hold myself out as an expert in counseling here, but I do want to share a bit of wisdom gained from dealing with people, over the years, with their various problems and concerns. I don't want to call it a short-cut per se, but it does get to the heart of the matter, and the sooner you can get the heart of the matter the better it is for all concerned, and it involves three components.

First, identify the sin at the root of the issue. Remember, all issues are ultimately spiritual issues, and there is always a sin at the core of each issue. Sometimes the core sin has led to other sins, and you must cut through these sins to find the core sin, the sin that is begetting the other sins. For example, one of the most frequent of the other sins is lying, which is occurring  to cover up the core sin. Another example is that many times when someone has been sinned against, it isn't the being sinned against (slander, abuse, defrauding, swindling, etc) that is the issue; but it is the unforgiveness (toward the perpetrator or God, or both) in the victim that is the core sin. Go after finding that core sin like a heat-seeking missile, because it will be the key to bringing healing and closure to the issue.

Second, determine if the person you are counseling is willing to deal with the core sin, willing to confess it as sin, willing to renounce it and repent from it, and willing to let it go. If they are not willing to confess it as sin, and/or deal with the sin, then no amount of counseling will help them. Many people who are unwilling to deal with their sin, are what I call chronic counselees; and much like the women in II Timothy 3:7 who are always learning, but are never able to come to the knowledge of the truth, these people (men and women) are always in counseling, but are never able to achieve healing. Pornography comes to mind, in that many who are involved will admit that it is a sin, but never come to the point where they are wanting and willing to let it go. Unforgiveness is also a sin that many are not willing to confess or deal with.

Finally, many times the primary issue is a salvation issue, and we also see this many times in those who are chronic counselees. There are many who think they are a Christian, who claim to be a Christian, but are not. These people do not have the spiritual capacity to understand Biblical counseling, nor do they have the spiritual capacity to obey the Scriptures (I Corinthians 2:12-16, Romans 8:5-8), and therefore cannot apply the Scriptures to their life and situation. In counseling you need to try and determine where the person is spiritually, so do not start off assuming the person is a Christian. Even though I have listed this last, it something that should be paramount in your mind as you begin the counseling process. A good healthy dose of the gospel during the counseling process is good for all, both saved and unsaved. For the saved it is a reminder of what God and Christ have done for them and their standing before them, and for the unsaved it is the key to begin the process of healing that starts with their very own soul (Jeremiah 17:4).

There are many complicated emotional and mental issues that people are dealing with, and I am not making light of them; however, most often, we find that the issues are understood and can be resolved by determining where the people are in relation to the components I have mentioned above.

By His Word

He created by His Word.

Genesis 1

He rules by His Word.

Isaiah 55:10-11

Jeremiah 1:12

He sustains all things by His Word.

Hebrews 1:3

Our Choices

As Christians, our choices should

lead to ever increasing holiness.

Being Under the Influence

One thing we can be sure of:  If we do not actively seek to come under the influence of God's Word, we will come under the influence of sinful society around us.  The impact of our culture with its heavy emphasis on materialism, living for one's self, and instant gratification is simply too strong and pervasive for us to not be influenced by it.  Once again, there is no such thing as a neutral stance on the continuum of influence.  We are being drawn more and more under the transforming influence of Scripture, or we are being progressively drawn into the web of an ungodly society around us.

Jerry Bridges

The Discipline of Grace

Page 171

What the Church Needs to Grasp

One thing the church needs to grasp 

more perhaps than ever before

is that its current problems are not

the result of failures in technique or

form, but failures of morality.

Carl Trueman

Reformation:

Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow

Pages 29-30

How Do You Compete with the Megachurch?

As the pastor of a small or smaller church, how do you compete with the Megachurch?  You don't!  The answer is obvious, it seems, as we are not and should not be in a "competition" in the body of Christ.  Our struggle is not against each other (church vs church) but with the powers and principalities, the world forces of darkness that surround us, and the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.  Our struggle is to present the gospel to the unsaved to bring them to Christ, and explain the gospel to the saved to make them more like Christ.  When you are competing with another church or churches, then you are competing based on observables (like buildings, numbers, programs, popularity/notoriety) which have nothing to do with bringing people to Christ, or making them more like Christ; which is the hidden work of the heart.

Here are three other reason's not to compete with the megachurch.

1.  The usual reasons behind competition of this sort are ugly.  Ego, jealousy, bitterness, selfish ambition, anger, revenge, discontent, and the like, are not wisdom from above, but are the wisdom of this world; which is earthy, natural, and demonic.

2. You don't have the resources to compete (money, talent, people, buildings, recognition, and so on).  I watched another local small church use many tactics and gimmicks over the last 3 years to try and compete with a couple of the larger churches; and they spent money they should not have spent, wore their people out, and discouraged themselves in the process.  They now have a new pastor, and the former pastor is working a secular job.

3. Many times competition leads to compromise, sometimes intentional, sometimes unintentional.  The reasons listed in number one above can blind us to the compromises that we make.  Sometimes, yes, even many times, the gospel is at stake.  Compromising on the gospel will soften its impact, dull its sharp edges, or even lead to abandoning it all together in order to be more attractive, less offensive, or more with it. Compromise can lead to ignoring or overlooking or making excuses for sin in the church; and sin not dealt with is sin that begets more sin, as a little leaven leavens the whole lump.

You know, competition for competition's sake is never a good thing.  Emphasis on growing the church instead of growing the disciples will always take a church down the wrong path.  The emphasis in the Scriptures is never on the size of a church, but always on the Christlikeness of the people.  The only church we see commended in the NT epistles is the church at Thessalonica, and its commendation is for its reputation of repentance, faith, and gospel sharing (I Thessalonians 1:6-10).  Even the two churches commended in Revelation were small, struggling, and suffering.

So, if you are tempted to compete, examine yourself to see what your motive is, and ask yourself what would I have to compromise on. Check yourself and be honest with yourself as this may reveal your true priorities in ministry. Remember:

Better is the little of the righteous

than the abundance of many wicked.

Psalm 37:16

NASB

Better that this describes your life and ministry. 

Humility and Wickedness

In the Scriptures, you never see the term humble 

used to describe the wicked.

But the humble will inherit the land and will

delight themselves in abundant prosperity.

Psalm 37:11

Our Own Opinions?

Our own opinions will never lead us to holiness, 

and without holiness none of us will see the Lord.

Righteousness, the practical out working of holiness,

is not culturally determined, but biblically prescribed.

God, through the Scriptures, has revealed to us

His moral standards.  These standards are absolute

and unchanging because their Author is Himself

absolute and unchanging; unlike our own opinions.